Just wanted to make a post to my blog right now...I am feelings really urgy and i guess i figured that maybe posting here will help...i guess i want to write and not cut...
I guess this is sort of a stupid thing to cut over...but it is really stressing me out and making me feel out of control...idk...those are the feelings that I deal with by cutting...when i feel out of control like i do now i just want to find some sort of control...
right now my roommate is in my room watching a movie with two other girls...i told her earlier that i have a test tomorrow and needed to study but she still took over my room and is watching a movie...
also i am just in general getting fed up and stressed out and out of control of having people in my room constantly...
I feel like I am really behind in my classes too now because there are always people in my room...
On the weekends my roommate leaves and i get two days to refresh and gain my control back and then when she comes back I am just stressed out all over again...and she right away starts having a ton of people in my room...
anyways....i just saw a friend and got a hug and chatted with her...and i am feeling a bit better now...
now to study...
Emmy R.
2 comments:
Don't do it, Emmy. It's not worth it, and you will regret the scars. My arm is slowly, ever so slowly, passing from scars that don't matter to yucky. Scary.
When did you last cut?
I met a girl once who self-harmed; she said she got her scars removed with surgery or something. So maybe I'll do that if it gets too bad.
Take it easy, Emmy. I'd recommend Ethiopia, the people are so nice and the culture is such a welcome difference from Western Europe - warm and welcoming.
Just so you know i didn't do it...
but every day is a struggle, though some days are harder than others.
the last time i cut was about a couple of weeks ago...i am not quite sure...i am not really the type of person who keeps track of the days...i used to and it helped then but i would go for so long and then mess up and i would be pissed at myself...
and as far as regretting the scars...i already sort of do...but at the same time I am proud of them...they got me through some really hard times in life...obviously it is not the best way to cope...but at least I was coping and i didn't give up...idk...
also i am not in western europe...i am in the united states...
Emmy
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