I ate dinner with my RA today because I wanted to talk to her about two different things.
One was the medication that I am on. I am on a medication for ADD which is very highly abused. I just wanted her to know that I was taking it so that she is aware that we have that medication on the floor.
After we talked about the medication she asked about how I was doing with the self-harm. I told her that some days were still hard and that I had struggled with it like when I get stressed and stuff. We discussed my relationship with my parents and if I would be able to tell them about the self-harm. I told her how I am not close to my parents and would not be able to tell the about this.
This would have been a great point to talk to her about the other thin I wanted to talk to her about, but I did not tell her.
The other thing I wanted to talk to her about was someone on my floor. The other day I saw this girl and she had 4 or 5 of what looked to be healing cuts on her arm. I wanted to ask my RA if she knew of anyone else on the floor who struggled with self-harm.
It is funny because I never realized how many people self harm. I guess I sort of felt so alone all the time when I was self harming that I knew in my brain that there were others but I didn't understand it in my heart. I mean there as always been the "invisible" people who I have talked to in online forums, but that just isn't the same.